Monday, November 7, 2011

Show me how...

Breathe and smile...
Love life...
All is well...
Easier said...
doing is a whole another thing...

I am still the same...
The same state from where i entered this hole...
seems like I can never get out...
Show me how...
to love myself...
Show me how...
to be disciplined again...
Forget about telling
Its time for showing...

My mom said...
dress up well... take care of your image... physical appearance is important...
love yourself... have self discipline... eat well... take care of your body...
and some other bla bla bla...
they were my mom's advices...
My teacher said...
Love yourself... and some other bla bla bla
they were advices too...
Other people said stuffs too...

But what I am...
A damn stubborn and ignorant guy...
Who lost his reason...
Who seems no one tried to understand or even understood him...
Which seems to be every side is giving, imploring, ordering, demanding and pressuring...
but none tried to come inside my hole and lift me up or even give a lending hand...
"You give me 10% I give you 10%" what my teacher said...
Whenever I tried... people weren't satisfied...
Whenever I did... people find it wasn't enough...
When I live for myself... by my own grounds... With my own principles and beliefs...
People say I'm wrong... 

I don't mean to drag anyone into my state...
I wished... wished... wished...
Prayed... pray... praying...
Until I gave up...
No help was coming...
None... meh... How'd i get so low...
My emotions are negative now...
its depressing... its lonesome...

I tried to find another company... to fill this void...
however i tried... seems like no one was willing...
perhaps maybe i didnt even wanted...
no one seemed to care...
people think they are always right...
just because i'm wrong, that doesn't mean your right anyway...

I plead the world...
show me how...
to love myself...
show me how to gain control again...
Give me a reason to live and fight...
Find me a motivation to move forward...
Give me the power to push and struggle...

The way I see life seems to be unfit for you to share
Find me a person whom is willing to spend their time for me and with me
To stop thinking about themselves to focus on just me
Talk to me in iirespective of your views but for just to hear and listen mine
I have given the world my life, my patience, my ear...
I know the world is not fair... I know i don't deserve anything...
I acknowledge the unfairness I understand but how can i appreciate it...
but we...
we all deserve fairness... we all deserve deserving...
we are in need of each other...
I am in need of somebody...
In need of a mentor...
In need of a company...
In need of a selfless person...
In need of a guide...
In need of an opportunity...
In need of a strength, motivation and reason...
Show me... 
Show me how...
Show me the road to my happiness...
Walk by me... guide me... by my own self temperament... self trait and personality...
Help... Help... Help...
not for instruction... but for a hand on the back....
H....E...L...P...

4 comments:

  1. "When Allah is our reason to live, we never have a reason to quit" insyaAllah :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. those words works for me, I just hope it works on u too =)

    ReplyDelete